We are supposed to hate him and his meddling ways. Melanie’s future mother-in-law, Kate, sends a staffer down below the Mason-Dixon to spy on Miss Melanie. And of course, Lurlynn is the one with “a baby…in a bar.” “Lurlynn” is the sound I make when I’m trying to talk while shoveling grits that are way too hot into my mouth at the Waffle House, after a long night of tossing back pinot grigio. He settled on Smooter, probably because no one would buy the name “Huckabee.” It rhymes.Ī dude from Nevada wrote the screenplay, and he needed a surname that Melanie would be embarrassed about.

Get it? It’s like cooter! As in “Crazy Cooter is comin’ at cha!” #boduke4life. Melanie’s parents are Pearl and Earl. The heroine of Sweet Home Alabama is one Melanie Smooter of the Pigeon Creek Smooters. In Greenville, South Carolina, I grew up with a Stephanie, a Kenneth, a Tonya, a Todd, a Brad, tons of Jessicas and tons of other Amys. The movie poster reads, “Sometimes what your looking for is right where you left it.” We should have left this flick in 2002, the year Ben Affleck was People’s Sexiest Man Alive, the year Justin and Britney broke up, and the year Nickelback hit number one of the charts.īorn and raised in South Carolina, I never heard such hick names in all my life. Sorry y’all, but Sweet Home Alabama does not hold up. Cue the Skynyrd and “War of Northern Aggression” jokes cuz Melanie is headed back to the Heart of Dixie to get her a dee-vorce. Surprise…surprise…surprise! She does! Melanie is still married to a man named Jake back in her hometown of Pigeon Creek, Alabama. Unfortunately, Andrew’s mom, Kate, aka the mayor of New York City, thinks Melanie has some skeletons in her closet. Between the election and the college football playoffs-Go Clemson!-, why not let Alabama have another fraction of my brain space?īasic premise: Melanie Carmichael is the IT girl of New York fashion. In my mind, I’ve been going to Carolina Alabama a lot.

So the other night, when Sweet Home Alabama was on E! The! Kardashian! Network!, I settled in with my needle and thread and remote control. I am up to my eyeballs in Christmas cross-stitch projects, and I half-watch mindless TV while I sew. “Forty years ago in Alabama, there’s a lotta mamas and daddies that would be thrilled that their 14-year-old was getting hit on by a district attorney.” Polling from Monday shows that Doug Jones has a 10 point lead (praise be!), but if you saw this Vice focus group, you will recognize that it’s dumb to bet against white evangelicals clinging to their delusions. Alabama being Alabama, the Senate race is very close, because in Alabama, moral turpitude is no longer disqualifying. Today is special election day in Alabama, where voters have the choice between Doug Jones, a kind, decent man who prosecuted the KKK, and Roy Moore, a bigoted, homophobic pedophile.

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